Linux Professional, sure, that's gonna make me rich.

So, today was just like any other day except that I woke up a little bit early. The extra time gave me the chance to practice my morning rituals that I have long abandoned since my life turned into adulthood. I tried to recollect all my momories being a kid, and the precise order of things for the morning ritual to start. The morning ritual starts with chanting and songs of rock music from the 80's. Followed with shower while doing the morning dance bare with only a soap in my hand as my imaginative weapon. And finally, a meditation period with eyes close as I wash off the shampoo on my hair. It doesn't end there, the ritual continues to a show of strengths, where I stand infront of a mirror, trying to do some push-ups and sit-ups to prove to the elders that I am worthy of thy respect. And the ritual ends as my task completes--with me leaving the ritual area--with my official war costume (yeah, its my office attire really).

But what made today special was that I finally received my LPIC Level 1 Certificate. Yes, the Linux Professional Institute Certificate, Level 1. Yes, the letter finally arrived, i thought they sent it somewhere else cause I got mine a little bit later after Ami and Mokhtar, who got to brag about it before I can....

Along with the certificate is a card for LPIC Level 1 members. Yeah, I'm kinda proud of it. Actually, I'm really proud of it. So that's why I am attaching a picture of my card here. Yeah, you can call me a poser, but I don't really care....and I'll explain why later. But first let me show off.

So what can I get from being a Linux Professional. Well, in Malaysia, probably not much but working for some company making NOT MUCH, with really bad benefits. Unless probably if I work for shell, I heard they have hired a couple of Linux experts. But do I really want to be in the support industry, becoming a System Administrator is not really what I enjoy. So that's why I'm just gonna brag about me passing the LPIC exams, cause I don't know what other use for it for now....

Ironically, I'm going to take another exam--the Sun Certified Java Programmer (SCJP)--which i might be able to brag again about but don't know what to do with it. I guess it will look impressive on my resume. That would probably help me get a job, but getting paid high, I need to be a total idiot. Maybe someone who knows how to pretend to know technical stuff and do marketing or better still a silly dispatch boy for some Dato'. But I don't think I'm the kind of person that can bend over so long just to make sure that my lips are actually the same horizontal height as my superior's arse. So there goes my chances to pass the LPAC, Lame Professional Asskissing Certificate. But I still have hopes to get myself prepared to get LPAC certification. :)

Parking Summonses for the poor

About one week ago, I went to the Police station to settle all my summonses. In Malaysia, they really come and knock on your door with a warrant to jail you for paying your summonses late. It has been a recent policy for the Police Department here in Malaysia and have cause a lot of publicity for the Police and unwanted publicity for the offenders. Some say its good the police is doing this, others find it sad that police Inspectors are now playing the role of local illegal credit institutions(Ah Long) trying to retrieve bad debts by sending gangsters with guns and threatens loan owners to pay their debts.

To get a report of all of my overdue summonses, there was a long queue and only ONE single counter that does just that. Needless to say, they had a system that works slower than the conventional paper filing. Paying summonses could probably take you a whole day, since they don't take credit cards, online payment, payment through bank, ATM and the other methods that could probably make it easier for busy working individuals to pay their summonses. To make things worst, the payment counter only accepts cash and are open from 9-12 and 3-5pm. The convenient time is for people who doesn't work obviously. You can't even run during lunch hour to pay your summonses, cause the police officers seems to have lunch from 12-3pm. My summonses adds up to about 15 summonses which totals up to RM 970. Yes just RM 30 shy from a 1000. I'm not really a hooligan on the road, I was never stopped by the police except for once for driving without a seat belt, yeah big deal...Boo f***ing hoo, thats dangerous driving. You probably thinking what kind of driving habits do I have to have such an abundant amount of summonses.

Looking at the summonses report, I see that 2/3 of my summonses are parking offences, one for driving without using a seat belt, one for speeding and the other 3 i can't really remember. Parking tickets!!! How ridiculous is that....I mean I'm fine with traffic offenses but parking offenses, thats like hitting someone below the belt. I mean, I feel it is wrong that there is no cheap parking around public service areas. I'm sure you find it funny too that a government office that everybody needs to go, but wait a minute, there is no parking unless you pay like 10 dollars per entrance for a parking area that is handled by some corporate company that was awarded to maintain the parking.

I mean don't we pay taxes??? How difficult is it to have a land for the public to park their car for maybe 50 cents an hour?
I mean, is that too much to ask. I'm not sure how other people feels about it, but something must be done. People pay taxes for the basic necessities, that includes parking to do our daily obligations like paying electrical bills, water bills, credit card bills, banking, making new IC and etc.....

I feel that with the rising oil prices, they could atleast help reduce the inflation by making parking a little bit less expensive. As if the tol is not lucrative enough. Who are we paying for here???

And what's the deal with police officers giving summonses to people driving while not wearing a seat belt. Is this offence really worth RM 70. I mean, a lot of people forget--don't tell me you always remember--the police should stop them and remind them for it, not try to make money out of them. There are a lot more serious crimes out there, people who drives too closely to other cars should get summonses for tailgating, they should be courteous on the road. But seat belts......?
The worst thing is, the police that stopped me for not wearing a seat belt asked for a bribe? When i said sorry, I think i did nothing wrong, he gave me a silly forget to where seat belt summon. Is this how our police should serve and protect our public....

Its sad that our tax money is used wrongly. I mean, I'm sure there are more serious crimes out there, why aren't the police out there busy observing drivers with serious potential dangers, but instead busy trying to get petty mistakes of drivers. Hoping that they can make a buck or two by hinting that, if they pay now, its cheaper. I've gotten this a lot....

Well, its all funny how things work, we all pay summonses, I'm sure you do, but the next time you pay yours, check to see, was that summon really a big deal. Hope someone will make police realise that they should start concentrating on catching drivers who tailgates, drivers who drive fast in housing areas and drivers who drives dangerously on the road. These are the people who are dangerous. And by all means, summon them, not making silly mistakes for parking offenses when there is no where to park or not wearing the seat belts. Apparently, these are only summonses for the poor, cause If i have a driver, and wouldn't mind paying RM 10 for a 10 minute parking, I wont get these kinds of summonses.

Inevitable

I always thought that Blogs are ridiculous. Its a place where attention seekers try to get attention, a place for people who have no life to keep themselves busy, a place where the egoist tries to display his ego and all that that maybe defined as POYO ( a poser).

But as more and more blogs are being created, I am drawn to create my own. Its an INEVITABLE force of nature. I'm not pretty sure why I'm doing it, but it seems that some force of social behavior coerce me into creating this very thing I hate. Its like disliking fat people, but loving everything that makes you fat, disapproving smokers but can't live without a cigarette and hating a hangover but love the beer. In Malay, its like Cinta tapi Benci which roughly translates into "Love but hate it". Makes no sense at all, which is perfectly consistent with everything else in our lives, like the government, the jobs we have, the bank loans we have, the credit limit we have on our credit cards, the credit we still owe the credit card companies, the price of buying a house, the price of getting a car, our own very actions in our lives, yada-yada-yada and the list goes on forever.

So I guess you can expect that my blog, the Sardonic laughter of a Satirist, is all about me trying to point out the things in our lives that are ridiculous and doesn't make sense, obvious. Its also to keep all my complains in one place. I'm starting to think that my circle of friends are sick listening to me complaining about every little thing. Hence, the web would be a bigger place for me to vent out my lonely sardonic comments.